the new term for farting is butt boxing.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
