In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
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