Well apparently he's into motor boating.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
