There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
