they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I was not drunk enough for that final.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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