so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
how drunk are you?
Several
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
