did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Randomize
