Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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