i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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