Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Randomize
