There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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