Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize