wrigley field is MILF paradise
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
