Dual....:-)
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I said "one day" and that day is not today
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
