Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
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