If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Help. Why am I so naked?
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