Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
So much Jack, so little girl.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
