I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Randomize
