I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Randomize
