Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize