He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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