My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize