I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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