I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
