I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
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