apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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