well I can't set my house on fire every night
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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