My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
