Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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