i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
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