have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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