Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Farmville is her only friend.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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