Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Randomize
