I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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