It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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