I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
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