i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
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