i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
