some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
