Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
