All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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