dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
