Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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