He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Randomize
