I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
