you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
