I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
