A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
