Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
