How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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