Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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