peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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